38 Weeks, 3 Days

I had my last office visit yesterday for baby #2! It seems like this pregnancy has flown by, despite it's unforeseen challenges.

I am dilated to 3 cm and my induction has been scheduled for Wednesday morning 10:30 at the new Dublin Hospital. I've been feeling a lot of pressure since Tuesday morning. I did not have this same sensation with Lily's pregnancy. But I was never dilated to 3 cm with Lily either. With my body being ready to deliver it gives me hope that this delivery will go much smoother than last.

Please, please, please go better than last time.

3 1/2 hours of pushing + vacuum suction + episiotomy + nurse on top of me pushing baby out = traumatic experience

I'm also praying that if I have postpartum depression that it is minimal. The first few weeks with Lily seem like an emotion-less, sob filled blur. I don't remember much happiness during that time and it scares me that it could happen again.

Although, I am taking preventative measures this time. I spoke with my OB who gave me the option of using an anti-depressant for the last 4 weeks of my pregnancy and then for the first 6 weeks of postpartum. I opted yes. For some reason it feels like I am a weak person for going on the medicine. Like, why can't I just fix it myself?! But I remember what it was like to be in that hellish mental turmoil, where I had no way to get out until it passed on it's own. With those memories still so vivid, I humbly and thankfully accepted this option of temporary treatment.

With that, here is to a happy, healthy baby and delivery! We cannot wait to meet our little baby boy.